I won't explain how it happened, but I ended up taking "The Mechanic" home last night. I thought that for better or worse, I could turn my brain off and indulge in something fairly trite, but at the very least entertaining. What I got wasn't even that. Less than thirty minutes into it, I had to stop.
All the empty platitudes concerning being "different" and being "professional" were bandied about. Donald Sutherland was essentially paid to come on screen, swear a bunch, then feature in a gimmicky action scene. A really porno-tastic sex scene was preceded by a "courting" (I can only assume that's what the producers/director think it was) that actually played out like a cologne ad.
And Mr. Statham?
I've seen fucking garbage cans that looked more brooding and emotionally overwrought. Seriously, stick to the tough guy routine. I sometimes wonder why I bother holding out hope that something stupid made in this day and age can at least be "fun". Gone are the glory days of "The Rock" and "Con-Air". Now we get five different films, three of which usually star Jason Statham, a sodding year.
Fucking dreadful, no?
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